No Matter What
No Matter Where
Its Always Home
If Your Heart Is There
I recently returned from a family reunion in Cape Cod. It was the first time in 6 years we didn't have to fly from California to attend a reunion; we instead drove up from our new home in Virginia. Before heading out to the Cape we spent a day in my hometown, Herkimer NY. While sitting in my parents living room I realized that I hadn't been "home" during the summer season since 2002. It was a strange realization and one that brought back questions I have turned over in my mind for the last 5 years, in brief: What and where is home?
In his book Home: A Short History of an Idea Witold Rybczynski traces the history of the concept of "home" back to 14th century townhomes in Europe. Bourgeouis townhomes provided one of the first senses of domestic comfort and differed dramatically from the contemporaneous castle of the aristrocrat, monastery of the cleric, and hovel of the serf. However medieval homes also stand in stark contrast to 21st century concepts of the idea: people rarely (though increasingly) live where they work; few in our rootless society remain in one place for their entire lives; and our complex food distribution systems leave us disconnected to the location where crops are produced. If the "home" in the 14th century was a permanent residence where people engaged in their trade, slept, and prepared meals from crops that surrounded their town, what is the meaning of "home" today? Definitions abound.
As this is an ongoing question and one on which I've spilled a lot of ink over years (including several research papers while at Fuller and a course proposal to USC), I'll probably devote several future posts to new questions I'm encountering regarding "home". Looking back: In what ways did Los Angeles feel like home during our seven years there? At present: How long will we live in Virginia until it feels like home? Looking forward: How do we create a sense of home for our children, even if we relocate houses or towns down the road? Perhaps home is simply where your heart is, but knowing the location of one's heart is equally perplexing!
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I've been meaning to read that book... What is "home" seems related in some ways to "What Time Is This Place?" (Lynch)
ReplyDeleteI've been back to Herkimer numerous times as we aren't that far away in Syracuse, but there is a definite feeling/atmosphere that I get when I go back in that direction. I also get it when going up north, where we also spent a lot of time during my youth.
Having just bought a house, it has been very jarring to think about this being my daughter's "home". It seems strange that she won't have her childhood take place in Bills, and Foley, and HHS (although that's probably a good thing and one can't go back to any of those places as they were anyway). What is it like to have your childhood NOT take place "up behind the hospital"??? Of course, for my husband, a Syracuse native, it's probably not as odd.
I've wanted to explore the idea of places that you can't return to (all of my primary schools, my grandmother's old house, my dad's house, for example). I've wondered if that is connected too - what is it like to not be able to return to anything that you would have identified as home? Many people have experienced this, of course, but it's not something I can identify with.
Home is definitely a very profound and intimate place for many people. For others--especially those that move around a lot during their youth--I've found (in a Sociology reserach project while at Fuller) that they identify home more with people; family and extended friendships) rather than places.
ReplyDeleteI agree that it is challenging to think of your role in shaping your children's 'sense of home'. I remember driving through Madison WI when I was 12 years old to see my mother's childhood home was. At the time it was the last thing I wanted to do. However, if my parents ever decide to move from their current house (my childhood home), I know there will be a strong pull to 'return there' (if only as a drive-by) at some point to show my children.
Place, home, rootedness. These are all fundamental concepts that are poorly understood in our emperically-oriented society.